Uh, oh. I forgot to love my virus into leaving.

And here it is, weeks later, still lingering, still giving me headaches and dizzyness and body aches and a general sense of being off and ill. I should have been doing my creative visualization I talked about, sitting down and nurturing my poor viral visitors into confidence and self-esteem so they could, like mature viruses, leave the nest and strike out on their own.

But I forgot. And the virii have apparently stayed on and make me feel icky.

Or it's not virii at all, but an infection. I need to figure out the answer, because the ways you creatively visualize with virii and bacteria are totally different. A lot of the stuff you try with virii, the bacteria will have none of. I am very much against visualizing violence against a virus or cancer. But bacteria? All they understand is violence.

Oh, of course, I don't mean all bacteria. Some of my best friends are bacteria. You know, the kind you get in Activia and Yakult. Those are good bacteria, helpful bacteria, pleasant and peaceful. Not the shiftless, evil, no-good, rock throwing, bomb-belt-wearing bacteria I inveigh against here.

If I have a bacterial infection, I'll proclaim, in my best Inquisitor voice, "Neca eos omnes. Deus suos agnoset." And then I'll destroy them all. Just like the end of Apocalypse Now. But in my body. Ouch!

Sure, the good bacteria will die, too. But I can always buy more Activia and Yakult and repopulate the good. So it's OK.

Gandhi = Evil

When Obama got the Nobel Prize, and people pointed out Gandhi didn't get one, I was thinking "Well, of course that sleazy hypocrite never got one!"

This article is a good briefing on why Gandhi, in my opinion, is about the worst person in the world we should be emulating today.

Why is Albom crap? Or: It's a Wonderful Life Sucks. Ikiru is Awesome.

I know Mitch Albom is awful, awful, awful. And it's not merely because he's sentimental. Rather, he's mawkish. Not sweet, but treacle... not simple, but simplistic. And he does it on purpose, writing books easily digested by 4th graders.

According to an article online, his favorite movie is It's a Wonderful Life. Which made me think.

What makes It's a Wonderful Life suck, and makes Ikiru one of the best movies of all time? To me, Ikiru and It's a Wonderful Life take on the same issues, but Ikiru does so with honesty and integrity.

But there's much more to it, and it comes down to small differences and huge ones and it's all too much to think about right now.

When I can rewatch both movies and think about it, I'll have the best blog entry ever, and I'll be able to explain it so well that not only will I make sense, but people will even put the Albom books down and pick up something good instead, something that may be sweet, but even more important, is nourishing.

Fighting this Cold.

I am Fighting my Cold.

It's one of the things required of patients. (At least in the West -- we'll ignore Ayurveda's totally different take on sickness cuz it's too rational and unfun.) We must be in the right mindset to fight our illnesses. We fight our diseases. It makes a difference. Are you going to roll over and let that disease kick your wimpy ass? Or are you going to learn to defend yourself?

When Sally gets cancer, we reassure ourselves that Sally will be ok -- after all, she's a fighter. Meaning that she'll what? Well, that she'll do what everyone else will do. She'll dutifully go for her treatments. She'll take her vitamins. But beyond that, she'll adopt a hostility toward her disease. She'll think of her cancer cells as illegal aliens, as Nazis, as BHO himself if need be, and she'll creatively visualize the most horrific violence being perpetrated against the evil Cancer cells. Because the Cancer is definitely attacking her. And Sally is not going to take it. She's fighting back. She's going to beat it.

I have never been much for fighting. I may have blogged years ago about my way of thinking... I want to have people creatively visualize their cancers as themselves, basically. After all, cancer is when the cells refuse to die. The cancer cells are having trouble letting go and facing their mortality, just like we are having trouble. So if cancer patients visualize holding their little scared cancer cells in their arms and rocking them, comforting them, telling them it'll be ok, helping their cancer cells transition from this plane to whatever awaits beyond the veil. Surely that will work just as well as imagining hatred and violence and destruction.

So that's what I should do with my cold.... it lingers, and then my body aches come back, and clearly the virus(es) in my body are not ready to go. They clearly are enjoying being here on this world, in my body. And why wouldn't they? The weather is beautiful. I have a beautiful family, and great coworkers. The virus has been living vicariously through me the last couple weeks, and is enjoying my life too much. So I have to hold my cold virus close, rock it, whisper to it, tell it that there's a whole world out there to explore, loads of wonderful hosts within which they can explore the world.